Tsunami of Awesome.

(This post was actually written September 14, 2014)

As it seems, I have often used the word "journey" to describe the last year and a half (or perhaps back even further). Almost like the way we used "intentional" during our Biola days. I cringe in fear that it may seem trite or cliche, which is not my goal. I tell you that I am not the same person that started this journey so many months ago. Perhaps it defeats the purpose if I have to say that, but I think that I am in awe that often I don't always recognize myself. I have gotten to a place where I an appreciate the smallest of things. I can truly celebrate in the joy of others. And I grieve with those that are hurting. Life is no longer about things. Money. Or power. It is about the way we can say "yes" to each day. I am guilty for getting caught up in routines and the stagnant. I can't even see how that is possible anymore. I have not had two of the same days in months. And though I was worried about what this new chapter would look like, I am thriving. I had my mini pity party when my teacher friends all started school, but I had to shake it off. My teaching career is a chapter of my past life. I lived that chapter. It was a good one. And also one of the hardest. The people still matter, but the career is no longer my calling.

With that being said, in the last week, I have seen the clouds pass and the fog lift. Is it clarity of thought from the REAL food I had been eating from Whole30? Is it the fact that I am getting the door beaten down by opportunity? Is it the Step Study I have finished after 8 long months? Or is it the messages I have been hearing preached in church? I am sure the culmination can all attribute to the tsunami of awesome, but really, and I mean reeeeaaaallly like real talk, it is that the pieces of the past (and the future) are finally making sense.

The journey has been one I compare to a roller coaster, and in the last year or so, I have been climbing, anticipating the gut wrenching drop. My stomach has done the flips. I have screamed (on more than one occasion). Clenched my fists, holding on for dear life. And now, I get to feel the wind in my hair. The laughter in the thrills of this part. I do long to share in this journey with people that are no longer on the ride, but I can't blame them for getting off the ride. It is not for the faint of heart. They have their own trail to blaze for now. And at times, it could've been best described more as a crazy train. Perhaps someday our paths will cross again.

For now, I am in awe of not only the provision in my life, but of incredible faithfulness. It is not good enough that I was allowed one blessing, but a multitude. That, my friends, is the definition of grace. I am now challenged to give that grace to others as it is abundant.

I look forward to sharing the specific details of this journey. I can tell you that I have had a sip of the entrepreneurial Kool-Aid and it is delicious. This life I get to live is shaping up to be better than I could ever hope or imagine. If you can stomach the inconsistencies it may bring, you can also relish in the thrills that come too. I now get to be incredibly creative. I am meeting amazing people. Having once in a lifetime experiences. I get to enjoy my days. I enjoy drinking my wine and I still have a few bad habits, but I am no longer stuck in a gear of neutral. I can confidently hold to the promises of this life. Hope. Love. Forgiveness. Healing. And an amazing future. This chapter is truly called my "Tsunami of Awesome."