What's My Address Again?

The new place is still under construction.

So as I know things have changed so fast for me this year that before I finish typing this sentence I will probably have another new address. Oh wait...that's right...I am moving. Yet again. In 6 weeks. It'll be Move Number 7 or 8 in the last 12 months. Oy vei. This move I will actually order address labels for and make sure my driver's license matches only so that it seems like I am settled this time for more than a minute. On that note, I have also decided to go back to the roommate life as I was given an offer too good to refuse. I think that it will be a healthy situation and perhaps will provide an for an interesting story someday. It will be nice to have someone there too. I am (we are) upgrading to a very nice new top-floor apartment in a beautiful area that will allow me to spend a lot of time outdoors in Peter's Canyon (as well as other local parks and beaches) so I can run again in good areas and my homegirl, Stella, will get to enjoy life in the dog park at our home. I am looking forward to the change (and to finally unpack--though cardboard brown is so the new black).

Trailer chic.

And though I have moved from La Habra to Cerritos to San Diego to Whittier to La Habra to stints in San Francisco to a vacation in Idaho to Santa Ana to Tustin, I have at least settled in to THE most amazing job. I hate to even call it a job as I don't feel like it is even work. I literally get to be in an environment surrounded by all things Ellen. Creative. Retail. Design. Food. Drink. People. And lots of movement and action. It is really everything in my wheel house. I had no idea such a thing existed. And though I miss the coaching and kids (and some people) of my past life, I could not love this job any more than I do. I work for a creative duo that are at the top of the game. And best part, I have a boss that is a creative genius, respectful, thoughtful, and funny. I had no idea how much my soul and spirit had been damaged in recent years by some in authority of my past professional career. But that has all seemed like ancient history as I work for people that encourage and build. Not a day goes by that I am not laughing and leaving the day feeling valued. It is a dream. Because in turn, I work that much harder and get to thrive in this place. What a novel concept.

People are asking me all the time what it is that I do. And to be honest, I am not sure how to put it in words. I manage an office of creatives. I facilitate the personal and professional schedules of my boss. I buy for the retail spaces. I get to shop and source furniture and accessories for our new ventures. I plan fun events. I get to be creative. I am part of many projects. I work with all kinds of people from city officials, to creatives, to restauranteurs and some major players in the development world. It is kind of crazy. Even more awesome is that I get to have a pulse on trends and pushing the design envelope as I learn from those I work with each day. I get to try all kinds of food and drink from the restaurants. I have met great people that are quickly becoming great friends. I wear whatever I want to work. My hair can be whatever color. And I get to be me. No judging. It is freeing. The bonus (besides these amazing people): we have a trailer and a shipping container in our office. Bet you can't say that about your work space!

Bunny.

Beyond life at The LAB, I have spent a good deal of time making these fly-by-night trips to San Fran. Thankfully my Pops and Katty Kat are there, but I also get to see my "Bestest." (That means he is better than a bestie.) We have been spending these moments together that feel like a blip on the radar, but honestly, we pack every minute. We are still this powerhouse known as Studio Black Sheep making events happen and gettin' it done.  It is amazing how someone can fill your life with so much love and laughter and joy and confidence all at once. And you can spend countless minutes together singing Katy Perry at the of your lungs and purring at each other without being annoyed. It is the best. And to be truthful, it is Jory that I can almost singlehandedly say has been a force in getting me back on my game. He is an amazing human. The kind that plants the deepest and most honest friendship one can ever ask for.

There is a handful of folk that I can say that about these days. They are the ones that know me best and have never left my side. I get to spend holidays with those families. Celebrate birthdays. Go shopping for creatures needed for a 5 year old birthday party or to even just clean out the garage (for days in a row). Or just show up at their house for Sundays together to do whatever the day may call for. It is the kind of stuff that takes my breath away when I feel the sadness for the yesteryears. I have these people that fill the empty spaces. They are more than friends. The "friend" word doesn't do justice. They've become family. And though they definitely don't replace the significant people of the past, they help to bring in new memories and help me to build again. Just this time as a better version of myself.

In a nutshell, I am back. I am alive. I am me again. It has been a decade or so, but watch out. The sleeping lions are wide awake. It was my 2014 resolution to THRIVE. And though this has taken on a completely different look than what I had imagined back on January 1, this is shaping up to be a chapter I couldn't have written better myself. And that, my friends, is how we know that we are NOT the authors of our own story. We simply play a role in a grander picture. Thank God for that.

And so, the ampersand chapter continues...&

Cheeseburgers and Goldfish.

Gone are the days of the .39 cent cheeseburgers. (Thanks for that reminder, Leslie.) Gone is the day of the dorm-approved goldfish pet that somehow birthed at least a dozen little swimmers (get your minds out of the gutter) that we housed in a bucket. And let's not forget the death of our beloved Mrs. C. from Y & R. Those were the days. The good 'ol days. These current days look a lot different. The goldfish is long gone. RIP Nameless Goldfish (The name escapes me. I am sure it had something to do with Jackopierce or some random Smokejumper). And the cheeseburgers, oh the cheeseburgers. Curse you McDonald's. Curse you for jacking up your prices. And curse you for your processed food. And curse you body for not being able to eat 4 of those preservative filled patties without adding extra pounds just looking at you. I add 6 inches to my backside just pulling through that blasted drive-thru. Thankfully, the only thing about that economy cabin fast food joint I guilt on now is their iced coffee.

Anyhow, I am continuing in this process of navigating...I read through my blog posts and this blog seems more like an aimless wandering through unwritten chapters. I have not had afforded you all the grace of my indecent humor or my dry smirks. I have been dying to share with you my obsession with Quinoa (the girl, not the grain). Nor have I truly been able to share with you the life of Juanito, my long lost who-knows-what out in Gustine. Or that Byron Scott is seriously the new head coach for my beloved Lakers. (I bleed the purple and gold--even through the rare, but atrocious seasons.) And my days of sharing about my reality trash TV obsession are non-existent. Bummer for you. Or should I say, bummer for me because my TV is somewhere in storage.

I hear you, Stella. This is exhausting.

Instead, I do all sorts of introspective reflection. Ugh. Gross. And I am in the midst of having (or getting) to share those skeletons with my sponsor to clean out the cobwebs. Cuss. Trust me, I have a hilarious side. I often tell people I am the funniest person I know. Rather these days, I question who I truly trust. The funny is on reserve. There are few I let in the sacred rooms of my heart. And there are those I want to let in, but they have declined the invite. Or maybe it is just that they get lost trying to find their way (again or at all). And then comes a bucket of other wonderings...Who am I now? What the heck am I doing? Who do I want to allow in my inner circle? This crap is exhausting. I long for the days when the biggest question was "What am I going to wear tomorrow?" Or "What day of the week is it so we can get those .39 cent cardboard delights?" First world problems.

There are so many other "crazy" things to share. Like random (or more like divinely orchestrated) encounters with people that say they were supposed to meet me at this time or that, as they have something to share with me. I still marvel at the friendships that have rallied and taken root in the land of foreverness. (That is better than BFFs.) The void of one is filled with many. I am fulfilled. I am happy (working on the joy part). And I am thriving (on most days). All of it seems to be part of a bigger puzzle assembling behind the scenes. And I am in this holding pattern wondering what it all means and how this all will play out.

#partyanimals

So as this journey continues, I hope to share the brighter sides of life (or at least my brilliant humor). The good mixed with the bad. The days when you can eat whatever and not care. (Curse you, Whole 30!) Or spend excessive amounts of time watching goldfish. Because that is real important. Reals important. For now, I share today's highlight (other than two a-mazing client meetings and talking with a few different friends at random) was watching Duke continue his pursuit of fly-chasing as well as an impromptu photo op for a dear friend's birthday. With that, let me present to you, Duke and Stella.